It’s possible, but rarely happens.“For the most part, people who wait for a job are unemployed,” she added.“For me, it’s just an excuse for being scared to go and put the effort in.“So you don't repeat the same mistakes over and over again.”Most good love is a slow burn — it takes a while to develop, Gandhi said.She believes attraction is important, but you don’t have to feel it right away since that instant spark is more about lust and less about the stuff of real relationships.Chances are you’ve heard the lofty remarks about how online dating is somehow inferior, a belief supported by the notion that singles can only really find love when introduced by friends or via some sort of adorably contrived movie meet cute.Of course, when you think about it, what seems more silly: joining a community of fellow looking-for-love singles, who are introduced to you based on potential compatibility?Like-minded people actually make for easier and healthy long-term relationships, said Dr. The more you see eye-to-eye on, the less there is to argue and compromise about.“That means you believe at any cost that you’re going to find that love; love is meant for you and it will come to you so that you just have to date like hell until you find it,” Gandhi said.You have to embrace the process of dating, so adopting a “psychotic optimist” mindset will make it more fun once you’re convinced true love is really out there for you.
Join social groups or meet-ups; be a worker bee in a cause you believe in; get involved in political parties.At the very least, you’re doing something you like and at the very best, you'll meet somebody like-minded.Bite the bullet and try online dating for a big pool of potential candidates, Schwartz added.If you’re shy, realize you could be less shy.“The idea is that you have to train for everything, and you have to train for love as well,” Schwartz said. You’re not a finished product unless you’re dead.”RELATED: Does dating feel like an 'unpaid internship'?
Author's advice to find love It’s important after a divorce or any break-up after a long relationship to take some time to be alone, said Nicole Baras Feuer, a divorce coach with Start Over Smart in Westport, Connecticut.“You will be in better shape to meet the ‘right’ person if you have time to heal, spend time alone to figure out who you are again, reflect on what went wrong,” Feuer said.
If you’re already online, try a different dating site.