“Even if you give them a little bit of room in terms of looks, that still leaves a really high bar for Asian men to be considered attractive at all.” To improve his success rate on Match.com, Maltempo created a rule for himself.Rather than cast a wide net, he would message just one woman per week.This alleviated the feeling of being overwhelmed and helped him get to know the person he was interested in.Maltempo compared this approach to meeting people at a mixer, where you can gauge your chemistry with only one person at a time.So I dumped him.] In a recent online survey of 900 Asian American men, Liu found that Asian men frequently feel stereotyped as lacking masculinity; they also said they’re perceived as undesirable and as too passive.Part of the problem, she says, is that the white American man has become the standard for what is attractive. There are few Asian American male leads in Hollywood, and only recently have more Asian characters been cast as love interests.Maltempo says women occasionally made assumptions about him based on his race.“When [I was] dating non-Asians, sometimes they were interested in exotic factors that I’m not a white guy,” he said.
“Dialogue rather than just messaging.” At first, Maltempo’s wife, Xue Jiang, was unimpressed by his messages. When he signed up for Ok Cupid in 2013, he was in Singapore but began using it more frequently when he moved to Portland, Ore., the following year.It was around then that he saw Ok Cupid’s data on race and attraction.The TV shows “Master of None” and “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend,” for example, stand out for pairing Asian men with white women.